As most of you know, we went in for our routine 35 week ultrasound October 1st. Everything looked great for our son, Nathan. He measured big and had a great heartbeat. When we went to check our daughter, Alexis, she was measuring smaller than we expected and we didn't measure a heartbeat. We thought that was strange but the ultrasound technician sent us to a room without telling us anything (they have to wait for the doctor to do that).
As we waited I had this overwhelming feeling that something wasn't right as we have always seen and heard a heartbeat. I immediately prayed that whatever news we heard, God would be there to comfort us. I really just thought that maybe she wasn't growing as good and that we might have to have them early since we had discussed possible things that can warrant earlier delivery. When the doctor came in, she said, "I have some bad news." Immediately my heart sank. She said, "Baby B doesn't have a heartbeat and has passed away." At first they said it was Nathan, but I knew Baby B was Alexis. We were in limbo for a minute, but we found out it was definitely Alexis.
I immediately cried uncontrollably. I was completely overwhelmed with grief. I have to say that in the 9 years I have known Lee, I have maybe seen him shed a few tears a handful of times. To say he was overcome with grief is an understatement. We discussed going ahead and delivering Nathan. I will say that even though I was overwhelmed and my heart ached, I knew that God had His hands on Nathan and that everything would be great with him. Lee and I called our family and wept in the room until we could compose ourselves enough to leave and head home to get our stuff so we could head to the hospital.
We got to the hospital and they monitored Nathan and he was doing great - great heartbeat, very active. They scheduled my c-section for roughly 5:00pm since I had something to eat at 9:00am. The c-section went beautifully. I kept focusing on Scriptures that were encouraging. It took a while since I have had a c-section before and had a good amount of scar tissue, but at 5:45pm I heard the greatest sound in the world, Nathan crying. Immediately came the tears. At that point I was still hoping and praying that maybe the tech was wrong and I would hear my precious Alexis cry. Needless to say, I didn't. The nurse came and told me that Alexis was beautiful and looked just like Nathan. Lee brought Nathan over to me and I got to love and kiss on him. He is so beautiful and I believe he looks just like Daddy's baby pictures. I opted not to see Alexis at that time as I knew that would be too much to handle while still finishing up my c-section.
We got everything finished up and I went to my room under the impression that Nathan would be in the NICU until 10:00pm (4 hours for observation). Well, he was doing so great that he came out in about an hour. I was thrilled. I couldn't wait to hold and kiss him. Lee and I had some time with him and then Luke came in and then family came in in groups. It was amazing having this precious heathy baby boy and enjoying him with our family.
Lee and I wanted to see Alexis and hold her and let our family have some time with her before we sent her to the morgue, but she didn't look good and it was too much for me to take, so I only saw her for a quick second and they went ahead and took her. I want to remember her from the sweet ultrasound pictures and active kicks in my belly for the past 35 weeks. They did give us a box with her footprints and some of her special items (blanket, hat, bracelets). I know we will cherish it forever.
Nathan did really well. We worked on nursing, pumping, making bottles, and getting into a routine (every 3 hours) while we were in the hospital. We got to come home on October 5th and it was really nice. It was so tough leaving the hospital with only one baby. Seeing Alexis' empty carseat and the double stroller in the van was almost too much for me to take. It just felt so wrong. When we got home and I had to go in the nursery for things, it broke my heart seeing all of her stuff (especially her name on the wall).
Physically I did great this time. I wasn't in labor for 26 hours this time so that helped. I recovered quickly which I know was an answer to prayer because I had asked God to heal my physically ASAP since I had so much to deal with emotionally.
We had a funeral service for Alexis on Friday, October 8th. It was beautiful but heartbreaking. I cried uncontrollably the entire time. It was almost too much to take. I was thankful I had Lee, Luke, Nathan, and my mom to hold onto during the service. So many wonderful friends and family attended and had such kind words for us. That made it more bearable. Our pastor did a great job and he shared some great letters that my mom, my mother-in-law, and I wrote. Lee's cousin sang "The Old Rugged Cross" and a sweet girl from church sang "I Will Carry You." It was just perfect.
On Sunday, my mom, Lee, and I went through all of Alexis' stuff and boxed it all up. We put a lot away in case God blesses us with another daughter down the road, but some of the things personal to her (her coming home outfit, special blankets, special stuffed animals) went into an "Alexis Box". It was so hard. I cried the whole time. It just felt so wrong to be putting that stuff away. We worked fast and got it all done in a couple of hours. The nursery looked so empty when we were finished. It still feels so wrong.
This week was a lot calmer since it was just Lee, Luke, Nathan, and me. We are getting into a routine. Nathan eats at 8, 11, 2, 5, 8, 11, 2, 5. He is getting good at nursing, but I am still pumping for some supplementation and to store for later. He gained back some weight at his check-up on Wednesday (October 13th). He weighed 5 lbs 8 oz. We are enjoying him so much. He sleeps all the time. We have to wake him for feedings sometimes (which is common for premies). He loves to be held and rocked and I happily do it because he should have been in my tummy for 5 more weeks and I believe he misses his sister.
It's been a whirlwind of emotions, highs and lows, ups and downs. I think I've experienced every emotion there is in the past two weeks. We are going through the best and worst time in our lives. It's hard to explain.
We've just been so blessed that friends and family call, write, encourage, pray, and bring meals. It makes it so much better. I can't imagine going through this without our friends and family. More importantly, I really can't imagine going through this without God. He hasn't left, forgotten, or forsaken us. He has a perfect plan and will even if we don't understand it all. I know Alexis Faith is in heaven and that we will all be together again. That is the hope that I cling to. God will heal our broken hearts, give us peace and comfort, and strengthen us for each day, each hour, each minute. He is ever present in our lives. To Him be the glory, honor, and praise.
Showing posts with label Doctor's Appointments. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Doctor's Appointments. Show all posts
Friday, October 15, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Luke's Dentist Appointment
Let me preface by saying that I am a terrible mother. I took Luke to the dentist at 3 and 3 1/2, but once we moved and the dentist was 40 minutes away, I slacked and didn't find a new one. It's not that I intended to, but I completely forgot until he turned 4 and I had to cancel at the old dentist, then I got pregnant and was sick for a couple of months, and then it just kept slipping my mind. So, my persistent husband reminded me that I needed to take him. I asked friends for referrals and got one that sounded good. I called yesterday and they said, "New patients can't be seen until November BUT we have an appointment tomorrow morning." Thinking that a) he really needed a check-up and b) November seems tough with two new babies, I took the appointment.
The place was awesome. The whole office was a jungle theme, including tiki looking stuff on the walls. Each area had a jungle-themed name (like the conference room was called "Tribal Council". How cute. They had Madagascar playing and a ton of stuffed animals and toys. When we were called back, each chair had a tv above it with Madagascar playing. Luke got to wear jungle sunglasses to not hurt his eyes from the bright light. The hygienist was so great with him. She told him what to expect and offered rewards for each step.
When we got to the teeth cleaning, he was offered an array of flavors to pick from. He chose cookie dough which sounded disgusting to me, but he liked it (so much he was licking while she was cleaning). She flossed his teeth for the first time and instructed me as to how to do it for him. He got a sticker and then it was time for x-rays.
He was a champ during the x-rays. They had to try a bunch of times to get one and he kept letting them. I was a proud momma. He got to get another sticker. Then we met with the dentist. She was awesome as well and had the best teeth I've ever seen (go figure, right). She said the tooth that he hit on the tub a couple of years ago was totally fine. She said his 6 year molars were showing up and he would have them early, which doesn't surprise me since he's always cut teeth fast and early. She said to continue brushing like we have been and start flossing and to come back in 6 months. Then Luke got to go to the treasure chest and got a parachute toy.
Overall it was an awesome visit and I felt better when they assumed it was his first visit as I guess most kids go at 4-5 years old. They even took a "first visit photo" to commemorate the occasion. I still want to be on the ball with his check-ups so he stays healthy and has good hygiene.
The place was awesome. The whole office was a jungle theme, including tiki looking stuff on the walls. Each area had a jungle-themed name (like the conference room was called "Tribal Council". How cute. They had Madagascar playing and a ton of stuffed animals and toys. When we were called back, each chair had a tv above it with Madagascar playing. Luke got to wear jungle sunglasses to not hurt his eyes from the bright light. The hygienist was so great with him. She told him what to expect and offered rewards for each step.
When we got to the teeth cleaning, he was offered an array of flavors to pick from. He chose cookie dough which sounded disgusting to me, but he liked it (so much he was licking while she was cleaning). She flossed his teeth for the first time and instructed me as to how to do it for him. He got a sticker and then it was time for x-rays.
He was a champ during the x-rays. They had to try a bunch of times to get one and he kept letting them. I was a proud momma. He got to get another sticker. Then we met with the dentist. She was awesome as well and had the best teeth I've ever seen (go figure, right). She said the tooth that he hit on the tub a couple of years ago was totally fine. She said his 6 year molars were showing up and he would have them early, which doesn't surprise me since he's always cut teeth fast and early. She said to continue brushing like we have been and start flossing and to come back in 6 months. Then Luke got to go to the treasure chest and got a parachute toy.
Overall it was an awesome visit and I felt better when they assumed it was his first visit as I guess most kids go at 4-5 years old. They even took a "first visit photo" to commemorate the occasion. I still want to be on the ball with his check-ups so he stays healthy and has good hygiene.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Surprise Doctor's Appointment
Well today around noon I started having Braxton Hicks contractions and pain in my stomach. After almost two hours, I figured I should call my doctor. I figured they would say, "Everything is okay, just lay down, and drink water." Nope, they wanted me to come in right away. That got me a little concerned, but I know that God has His hands on me and the babies. I got my prayer warriors praying and headed to the office.
They checked my cervix and it was closed and very, very thick. They also did a non-stress test (NST) for about an hour in which they monitored the babies heartbeats, movements, and if I had contractions. They had the same strong heartbeats, moved the whole time, and I didn't have any contractions (or at least nothing they seemed concerned about). The hardest part was keeping Luke entertained for the duration.
She told me that any discomfort I have (ie groin pain, pelvic pain, leg pain) is completely normal with a subsequent pregnancy and with multiples. YAY! ;) She also said if I get Braxton Hicks contractions to lay down and drink a lot of water and see if they get better/worse. If worse, I am to call.
So everything looks really good. I am looking good for not having pre-term labor. YAY! I am really praying that no matter how uncomfortable I have to be that I can make it to 37-38 weeks and have healthy, hearty babies. I appreciate everyone's prayers. I know they are working. :)
They checked my cervix and it was closed and very, very thick. They also did a non-stress test (NST) for about an hour in which they monitored the babies heartbeats, movements, and if I had contractions. They had the same strong heartbeats, moved the whole time, and I didn't have any contractions (or at least nothing they seemed concerned about). The hardest part was keeping Luke entertained for the duration.
She told me that any discomfort I have (ie groin pain, pelvic pain, leg pain) is completely normal with a subsequent pregnancy and with multiples. YAY! ;) She also said if I get Braxton Hicks contractions to lay down and drink a lot of water and see if they get better/worse. If worse, I am to call.
So everything looks really good. I am looking good for not having pre-term labor. YAY! I am really praying that no matter how uncomfortable I have to be that I can make it to 37-38 weeks and have healthy, hearty babies. I appreciate everyone's prayers. I know they are working. :)
Saturday, June 26, 2010
21 Week Doctor's Appointment
So on Friday (6/25) I had my 21 week doctor's appointment. It went really well. I had gained 8 pounds in 4 weeks (a total of 12 for the whole pregnancy), my blood pressure was great (112/60 I believe), and we heard both heartbeats (130s/140s for both). She did tell me to keep an eye out for signs of preterm labor (Braxton Hicks contractions or cramps) as it is more common with multiples. Everything has been fine so far so I am not worried. I will keep an eye out just in case.
I go back for a check-up and in-office ultrasound in 4 weeks (25 weeks). I am also getting another "special" ultrasound at the hospital in 3 weeks (24 weeks). I can't wait to see the babies again. It's fun having twins in that you get tons of ultrasounds.
The coolest thing I heard was "24 weeks is the week of viability" which means that the babies have a good chance of survival then, not that they will be born then (God-willing), but it is nice to hear.
I am just so thankful that everything is going well. I can't wait to see the babies again in a few weeks. They are awesome miracles from God. :)
I go back for a check-up and in-office ultrasound in 4 weeks (25 weeks). I am also getting another "special" ultrasound at the hospital in 3 weeks (24 weeks). I can't wait to see the babies again. It's fun having twins in that you get tons of ultrasounds.
The coolest thing I heard was "24 weeks is the week of viability" which means that the babies have a good chance of survival then, not that they will be born then (God-willing), but it is nice to hear.
I am just so thankful that everything is going well. I can't wait to see the babies again in a few weeks. They are awesome miracles from God. :)
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Babies' Down's and Trisomy Results Great
Last Friday we went for a special ultrasound and we had extra analysis done of my blood, their individual neck thicknesses, and my age to determine each baby's chances of having Down's Syndrome or Trisomy.
We got the results back today and they were great.
Baby A has a 1/1,000+ chance of Down's and a 1/10,000+ chance of Trisomy.
Baby B has a 1/10,000+ chance of Down's and a 1/10,000+ chance of Trisomy.
All of these results mean that our chances are rare. I have the same chances as a 20 year old. Sounds good to me. :)
We got the results back today and they were great.
Baby A has a 1/1,000+ chance of Down's and a 1/10,000+ chance of Trisomy.
Baby B has a 1/10,000+ chance of Down's and a 1/10,000+ chance of Trisomy.
All of these results mean that our chances are rare. I have the same chances as a 20 year old. Sounds good to me. :)
Monday, April 26, 2010
12 Week Doctor's Appointment and Bonus Ultrasound
Today I went to my regular OB for a 12 week check-up. I figured I would just get the usual things done - weight, blood pressure, urine check, and a doppler heartbeat check. I got lucky and the doctor wanted to do an ultrasound to really make sure she saw both hearts beating and could tell their heartbeats were strong.
So I got to see our precious babies again. YAY! They looked just as cute as they did on Friday. Today they were turned the other way. We saw Baby B moving around a lot. We saw B's heart just a flickering. She said it was very strong. Baby A looked like it was sleeping. Baby B "kicked" Baby A and A started moving around like crazy. We saw A's heart flickering as strong as Baby B's. B's looked really strong also.
I didn't change weight by a single ounce which the doctor said is fine since the babies look good and I started out overweight. We discussed weight gain and she recommended about 0.6 pounds a week until the end. She said the main thing is to eat healthy when I am hungry. That is my focus. I am going to watch the scale but I am going to eat when hungry and aim to eat a lot of good healthy things - fruits, veggies, dairy, protein, whole grains, and water. I don't want to gain more than necessary but want the babies to get everything they need.
She said to come back in 4 weeks for another check-up. I don't know if they will do another ultrasound then as I will be 17 weeks and we did one with Luke at 18 weeks and found out his gender. They sent me to a specialist last time since I had a cleft to have more detailed ultrasounds done. I am pretty sure they will do that again, but I wouldn't mind finding out a little early what the genders are.
I am so happy that I am doing great and the babies are doing great. God is awesome and our prayers are being answered.
So I got to see our precious babies again. YAY! They looked just as cute as they did on Friday. Today they were turned the other way. We saw Baby B moving around a lot. We saw B's heart just a flickering. She said it was very strong. Baby A looked like it was sleeping. Baby B "kicked" Baby A and A started moving around like crazy. We saw A's heart flickering as strong as Baby B's. B's looked really strong also.
I didn't change weight by a single ounce which the doctor said is fine since the babies look good and I started out overweight. We discussed weight gain and she recommended about 0.6 pounds a week until the end. She said the main thing is to eat healthy when I am hungry. That is my focus. I am going to watch the scale but I am going to eat when hungry and aim to eat a lot of good healthy things - fruits, veggies, dairy, protein, whole grains, and water. I don't want to gain more than necessary but want the babies to get everything they need.
She said to come back in 4 weeks for another check-up. I don't know if they will do another ultrasound then as I will be 17 weeks and we did one with Luke at 18 weeks and found out his gender. They sent me to a specialist last time since I had a cleft to have more detailed ultrasounds done. I am pretty sure they will do that again, but I wouldn't mind finding out a little early what the genders are.
I am so happy that I am doing great and the babies are doing great. God is awesome and our prayers are being answered.
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